Published: 18/03/2026
This Week’s Observations from the Front Line...The Great Kitchen Worktop Disappearance
There is a curious phenomenon that occurs in almost every home, regardless of size, layout or value.
It begins innocently enough.
A toaster appears.
Then a kettle upgrade.
A coffee machine arrives, because this is the year we stop buying takeaway coffee.
An air fryer joins the party.
A fruit bowl is introduced, usually containing one optimistic banana.
And before anyone quite realises what’s happened, the kitchen worktop, once a vast and open space, has completely disappeared! In its place is a carefully assembled display of modern living. There is just enough room left to make a cup of tea, provided you move three appliances, a chopping board and at least one unopened parcel from Amazon.
Viewings at this point become a delicate exercise. Buyers peer over the appliances and say things like:
“Oh, there’s plenty of worktop space here.”
This is technically true.
Because beneath the air fryer, coffee machine and miscellaneous kitchen optimism, there is indeed a perfectly good worktop… somewhere.
Sellers, of course, are fully aware of this.
Which is why, just before photographs are taken, a remarkable transformation occurs.
The worktops are cleared.
The appliances vanish.
The fruit bowl remains, now containing three limes for reasons nobody can explain.
And suddenly, the kitchen appears spacious, calm and entirely under control.
Until the next morning, when everything quietly returns to its natural habitat.
And the great kitchen worktop disappears once again.